It’s just so nice to actually get out of the house every so often, even if it’s just into the garden.

I’ve been feeling very flustered again lately, but this time it’s a little difficult to know why. I’m putting it down to a resurection of Spring Feaver, hormones and a mis-behaving computer.

I had a sudden urge today to not only spring clean the house, but to try and sell some more junk, move it to my room and re-organise my website. So much I want to do, but so much of it revolves around my comp, which, as I mentioned, seems to be acting up again.

So this is all very frustrating for me. I can’t abide sitting in front of the tv when there is stuff to do. So:
“Dad, do you mind if I go dig up the garden?”
“Hum? No, sure.”
Well, I only dug up a little of it, enough to plant my lawn camomile and some tyme, and take up some dandylions, but it was nice to be doing something. Especially in the gloaming.

The gloaming has to be one of my most faviourite times of day. It always reminds me of camp [actually there are a lot of times that remind me of camp]. It’s a quiet time of day, when all the activities are done, when tea has been washed and put away, and its approching the time you begin to snuggle round a fire and laugh and sing and have fun. It’s also the time you sing taps, a simple tune that sounds really beautiful when sung by a clear soprano:
‘Day is done,
Gone the sun;
From the hills,
from the sea,
from the sky.
All is well,
safely rest,
God is nigh.’

And with that I think I shall go inside, for the day cools and I’ve no fire to warm myself by.

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Heh, I spend most of today’s breaks trying to compose a blog entry along the same lines as yesterdays. I started 4 times, and each time I scrubbed whatever I had written out. Now if that’s not a prime example of avoidence, I don’t know what is.

On a different note, I’ve been invited to go to the London Movie, Comic and Media expo this weekend. Naturally I said yes. Whoo! My first expo/ con! Now if only I could think of an cosplay outfit that was quick and cheap…

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It’s funny, ya know? I’m sat here, in the car, going down the M27, surrounded by beauty and sunlight, and I’m having trouble getting inspired. I just saw a swan, in fact, sat on her nest on the bank of an unknown river, but it’s not doing any thing for me.
It’s VE day today, and the car is playing Radio 4 – memories of veterans. But still, it doesn’t inspirer me.
I got Andy’s PDA precisely for the chance to record my thoughts on the move, and yet, here I am, with nothing to write.
Sucks, don’t it?

That said, when kitty rang me last-last week, after a very long conversation, she effectively told me to be more frank with myself, and bare my soul a bit more. I’ve no idea if this will make my writing more interesting, but I think if I don’t bare it to the world, then I wouldn’t bare it to myself.
My ultimate weakness – pain.
There, I said it. Admitted it. In writing, black ‘n’ white, 1s and 0s. Both to myself, and, effectively to the world.
My ultimate weakness is pain. Any pain. I hate pain, and I will go to almost any length to avoid it. Which is why this is so hard for me [as well as the bumpy road - still on the road. Maybe I should do this later. Oh, look. Avoidance.]

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Okay, so I’m home now, after being out at Amberley working Museum. I had a fair day there, it was quite cold. I got two books; Shadowmancer by GP Taylor and The Paper Men by William Golding, both of which sound really good, and I shall look forward to reading them. Eventually. I also got a few nice pictures, some of which I shall put up later. [Digression: maybe I should just make a picture gallery? It'd be a lot easier than editing everything down to 500x375 and 'framing' it]

I was planning to write more on the subject above on the way back, but fell asleep from Arundel to the New Forest. And so I’m finding it rather difficult to get back into the frank and open state I was in earlier. So, you’ll have to wait awhile for Further Adventures into the Psyche of Dru.

But I hope the Kitten is happy I made this effort at least.

[Oh, in other news, I'm looking to buy a bunch of teach yourself books. I wish to become a learnéd person. Andy has also called me a knowledge whore ]

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I was planning a huge entry today on how I feel like I suck at work, and something about wedding vows, and possibly something else but I’m just too tired to do it. Oh and money is confusing: Ebuyer seem to have charged me something the Rat bought [Rat is in scotland so I can't confirm], and Natwest have possibly closed my account even though I only asked for the card to be cancled.

Would that the kitten called me today; I could use the life boost. [Bad day. Bad!]

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