How others see us means so little to you,
but to me it is everything.
I know this about you,
you should know this about me too,
by now,
how paranoid I am.
But how is it that you see me?
Would you like to know how I see you?
I imagine you see a girl trying to be a woman,
a drink in her hand,
smudges of make-up on her face.
You see this beautiful woman,
curvy but not grossly so.
You see her laugh and smile,
how she behaves so cutely but flatly denying it,
her rage and anger against the System, the Man,
and her small quirks that make her her,
and you love her.
You see that child,
how she whines and moans,
how she refuses to grow up,
how she wants you to take care of her,
and how she just wants some love and care and attention,
and you refuse her.
And you?
I see a beautiful man who takes care of me,
and would never intentionally do anything to hurt me,
who would never allow anyone to hurt me,
who I couldn’t consider being without.
Who makes me laugh and smile,
and feel special,
and I love him.
But sometimes, I see a horrible monster,
cold, uncaring,
cruel even.
Who doesn’t want to help me,
who doesn’t want [it seems] to even be with me,
who turns his back on me at my most needful,
who makes me cry all the harder for his abandonment.
And I hate him.
And so, with my ending here, I conclude:
I do not know what to make of you, sometimes.
And I suspect you do not know what to make of me.
And I do not know where this poem is headed.
But that’s okay,
because we have our whole lives to finish it.
☮&♥
Hey,
I felt the same way….sadly we are not together anymore beacause he wanted too much from me…and i wouldnt give it to him..but when he didnt feel this he would love me until it was the end of the world..and i loved him the same..he wanted my virginty…i couldnt…i was far too young (13)….and i still love him like hell..yuntil the day i die i wil still love him the same..and he noes it too..he was my lover, but he was also my enemy…right now we are just great friends…but he noes
Easy reading is damned hard writing.