This post has been percolating in my brain for a while now, and I’m still not quite sure I’ve found the words I want. But anyway.

I’ve not told too many people, but I’ve been treated for depression for the past five months now. This, combined with coming off the pill, had made me feel like I was going through a second puberty; Hormones running amok, body shape changes, excess sweating and greasy hair, mood swings etc.

However, now everything’s settled down again, I’ve found it to have a very positive effect. I’ve stopped thinking of myself less of a girl and more of a woman. I feel like I’m more in control of who I am, and what my identity is. I’ve been rediscovering make-up and other beauty products that make me feel so much happier about my appearance.

Following on from that, the realization that I might soon be a mother has made me start eating properly again. I’ve been keeping off the dairy etc, or trying to keep them as treats. As such, I feel so much healthier and full of energy, and I think I may have even shed a few pounds Scratch that, according to the wii fit I’m 11st 10lb That’s a lot less than the almost 13st I was this time last year. I could still stand to loose some weight (my BMI is still ‘overweight’), and tone myself up, but overall I’m feeling much more comfortable with my body shape.

The house is in a good place right now as well. There are a few bits left to do, but they are mostly just small tweaks and ongoing maintenance. I’m also trying to be greener, both at home and at work. We’ve got it to the point at home where we have two bags of recycling to one bag of trash which I think is a pretty good ratio. Work is a bit harder, but I’m getting there either by bringing home empty bottles and old newspapers, or taking them out to the public recycling bin outside our shop. But I know I can improve on the shop floor.

Oh and not forgetting G3-Radio.net, the new project Dan, Crace, I and a few others are working on. TGR got closed down so we started out own station. Things are going pretty well. If you want to keep up-to-date on that, just keep an eye on the website, our Facebook page, or the twitter feed (@g3radio).

Everything just going really well at the moment. I feel healthy, happy and confident about myself and life right now. The year is shaping up for good things.

Al in all, everything is awesomely fantabulous.

_{(Photo © Sunagatov Dmitry, from 123rf.com)}

☮&♥

Honest I ent!

Damn I do to many of these types of posts, and I really should get back to writing a regularly again, but I just can’t seem to find much to talk about. So instead we have a general round up since last time.

Good:
Christmas
Starting our own radio station
My compy is kinda sorta fixed

Bad:
Tgr closed down
Been feeling xmas after effects and generally quite meh
Being off the pill. Second puberty anyone?
Feeling so ditzy. There’s so much I want to plan out and do but it’s all so swampy in my head right now
Minecraft. Don’t get me wrong, I still love it but it might be time to put it down for a while

I’m thinking the trick might be to leave off planning some external things for a bit and focus on one thing at a time. The house is currently my majour concern, getting everything tidy and giving thing proper homes and such. I want to have a clear out and reduce, reuse and recyle stuff. Then once the house is in a state when it basically runs it’s self then I can look to things like radio, iseries events, viking, nano etc

☮&♥

So, new year. A time of reflection and learning, hope and new begginings.
So reflections first

The good:
I series events
Meeting ash
Getting a tat
Deciding to try for kids

Bad
Being a fail ML
Coming off the Pill
Andy being sick
Having clinicl depression
… and therefoe not being able to drink for 4 months including over xmas

Ugly
Work

What have I learnt? Not to be so nice; not to try and be helpful; not to over exert myself; that I am an excelent organiser

Hopes for the new year?
New job, kids, be at ease with myself, sort my finances out, sort my body clock and diet out, loose some more weight, finally learn the bloody violin, see ash again, maybe restart writing.

☮&♥