The Mow
The Mow; A mysterious beast sited on the end of many a unsuspecting person’s arm. What is this beast, and were did it come from?
An explanation of the Mow, by Ryan Trevett
The mow is not my own creation, its actually from a guy going by the name of Oliver.I adopted the mow, and during this adoption I found the mow was developing an interesting personality. I quickly learnt that a normal mow does not have a particularly strong grasp on the fundamental laws of physics, one example is of how gravity works – they think that if they don’t want to fall down, they don’t have to, the freaky thing is, it works! For the past 6 years I have learnt about the Mow’s eating habits, how it competes with other mows, mating procedures (what they do when they get horny), and birth procedures.
Unfortunately, recently I have discovered that a mow has an evil counterpart called a maw. Maws are much like mows, except that the head is replace with a 5th leg, and its single eye is attached to a tail like growth at the rear. Instead of legs that are similar to human fingers, the ends resemble the claws of a monster from a horror movie.
Provided I don’t get any more nasty surprises like that from mow, I will be very interested on its other aspects of life. I am currently studying its concepts on religion and its belief in superior deities (if any).
Quotes from people who have seen the Mow:
“Mows live for ever!” -Ryan, the adopter, and populariser of the Mow
“Kiiiilll iiitt! Kiiilll them aaallll!”-Luke, hell-bent on exposing the mow as a menace to society and disposing of them all
“Hail to the mow killer”-Adam, referring to Luke, who also hates mows
“Can I get back to you on that one, its gonna take me forever”- Katy, when asked to comment on the mow [she has her own family of Mows]
“Ok… Your people are very… strange aren’t they”-Owen, when first exposed to the Mow
“Mow’s rock! All two of them [Bob and Jill], and their subsequent clones.” Me
‘Are you sure that thing isn’t dangerous?…. (backs away slightly)’ Owen again
‘Ohhhh Myyyy Godddd I’ve got one in me too, what is this… night of the hosts of mow…?’ Sarah, after my birthday when she discovered she could do a good mow as well
‘One can judge the worth of a person’s character by their ability to understand Mow and their willingness to spread Mow’s fame’ Miranda, a Liverpool person who has been infected with the desire to adopt a Mow.
The Mow’s Picture Gallery
Click on a thumbnail to enlarge
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Ryan’s mow Bob on the left, and Katy’s mow Anon, on the right, possibly playing at being ghosts.
Anon again, doing spectral things to Ryan’s head.
Bob, flying in the face of danger… Wait, no, just flying in the face of Charlotte.
Eeek! What’s that on my head?
Oh, it’s only the mow.
OMG…What’s it gonna do…?
More pics coming… Eventually.
Mow Sound Bites
Mow at the Movies [MP3]
Mow hits Kitty [MP3]
